| Im a Market |
[22 May 2009|11:38am] |
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mood |
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 annoyed |
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I feel very volatile. Eg. Suddenly happy, suddenly not. Feeling different from one minute to the other. Its not that i have alot of time to think about things. I ponder off while im doing something else. And if only i could just say what i wanted to say and get it over with. do what i wanted to do and thats it.
It was well thought out. the words were already at the tip of my tongue ready to drop, but something got in the way... Then the second thoughts came in again. i paused to long. And re-thought again.
father said " the world is of the audacious". Ill take it into consideration.
That "Patience is a virtue" thing isn't really working for me.
Fuera.
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| Futuroes |
[04 May 2009|08:27am] |
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mood |
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 curious |
] |
Everything seems to be going in the direction i for the most part want them to be. i feel im in a semiperfect position not only socially but personally. which i believe is very important. As cheezy as it may sound i know its because of how ive been aproaching my opportunities. like performing more, not being afraid of bad critisism. and if i do get bad critisism i have to get better, even with no feedback i have to get better. i cant be mediocre.
I am aware that everyone always wants more than what they have or maybe just what others have, it is selfish, but i want more of what i can personally achieve. i want my own way of getting things without having to stump someone down or throw someone off the bridge along with me. i just need someone that can hold my arm if im hanging of the side, just like i would do for them.
ohhhh i have an exam in a bit lol adios!
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| uhh |
[06 Apr 2009|09:32am] |
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mood |
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 crazy |
] |
Hate to say i told you so. not really...
I TOLD YOU SO!!
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| Carnavaaal!! |
[27 Mar 2009|08:38am] |
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Went to the carnival day before yesterday with Crisselda!! it was pretty cool. haha and fun. hadnt gone to the carnival in a while, hadnt screamed in a while either. lol all was well. what sucked was that there was a closer carnival that looked like it had more rides on 10th st. oh well, it was still awesome!
adios.
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| OK this is not what you think |
[17 Mar 2009|01:40pm] |
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mood |
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 very |
] |
She1 never said anything
she2 said something :)
She3 is Quiet and different.
im Caught in another situation... or am i? lol
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| Memo to self |
[02 Mar 2009|08:24am] |
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mood |
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complacent |
] |
The reason i act so demandingly is because i want a friend i can count on. So i try to make it clear to my "friends" what i want. someone to be there for me. dont expect for me to be there for you if you are not there for me, even though ill probably still be there, dont count on it.
so if your wondering.. wait more like if you even care, i dont have too many poeple i can count on excluding my parents, most i can count is two. so your either going to be there, or dissapear...
adios!
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| haha |
[26 Jan 2009|09:12am] |
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This last show on friday was awesome!!
i really enjoyed it. most of all my friends went and liked it, even kristen went! im really glad everyone appreciated the music. oh and not to mention the food also.
so far its been slow, still doing the same things... the bank, school, but now im recording more, and its coming out pretty good. The only thing a actually want to know so far is if a certain person likes me or not. but i mean everything is ok for now.
life lesson, having more confidence in myself has helped me gain more confidence from others.
Ps: enjoy life while i can... :)
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| uhhh |
[19 Nov 2008|11:48pm] |
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mood |
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calm |
] |
and my phone ran out of battery,
and she thought i left her there again...
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[18 Nov 2008|07:44pm] |
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mood |
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 depressed |
] |
you think i dont miss you...
i wouldnt have called at all.
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| hi |
[13 Nov 2008|09:52pm] |
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mood |
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hopeful |
] |
ill Start off with Idk what part of my life this is.
ive been trying to be productive but often feel that im restricted from going to far out of my little box. Time, contacts, or poeple above me dont REALLY give me the opportunity to advance. and i know i can. Not having my degree doesn't help much either, but i want to do as much as i can with the time and, i guess, "talents" God gives me. either way i may not know exactly where im going but i know im going.
as long as i keep doing things without changing myself, my personality, ill get to the place where i want to be. i just have to build my character just a bit more.
this journal is usefull!
i write things, reread them and then try to follow my own advice, lol. but my real friends advice is also really good too. :)
adios
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| I think it has been a while since... |
[26 Jun 2008|10:01pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 fartsmell |
] |
i wrote in this,
i got a real hug,
i got a sincere answer,
i stopped whining... about girls. ha
the circle(life) keeps on spinning... i'm dizzy =0.
i'm in a country band now as lead guitarist. we are playing at hestec as one of the opening bands. which reminds me, it also has been a while since i performed. this saturday my cousin and i are playing at a wedding for a little while. a small acoustic thing. no biggie.
Boss?? everyone at work calls me boss now. lol and they're serious, its actually pretty funny. :) it helps to remind me that age doesnt matter if you want to earn some respect.
and i found out what business i want to put up first... its going to be a surprise for now. i need the riht plans first.
for now, goodbye journal"zzzzzzzzzz"
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| The world... |
[09 Aug 2007|11:54am] |
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-is crazy! so am i though. at one point i think i know what im doing and so it with assertiviness, but not much time passes before i start thinking "did i do it right"
she is truly beatiful, and she can be so giving in so many ways. she has a perfect smile with a slanted tooth which makes her smile that much better. she clumsy in cute ways, even though she thinks i get mad. i want her with me! just one thing...
you dont want to be here anymore, and wont because you still have your junior and senior year. you have parties to get invited to, and friends to hang out with, and busy schedules that most probably wont include me. i am afraid... thats what it is. afraid that between those two years that you most long for, i will not be enough. or maybe be to much. afraid that once more you might say " i dont know if i want to be with you anymore". i do love. and it does hurt, but my "macho" ego wont show you with tears.
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| man.. |
[02 Jul 2007|11:54pm] |
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mood |
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crappy |
] |
This Sucks!.!!...!!!.
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| Ill be back |
[22 May 2007|12:03am] |
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mood |
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apathetic |
] |
i went to the skate park again to relieve my "stress".
i played 8 poeple skate and eventually beat them with my cheap cheat tricks. heh
didnt have fun necessaraly, but i let it out on the skate board...
these days are going to really seem long, and im learning alot about everything. i still feel like a robot... go to work, come back, go to work, come back. everyday, but oh well. maybe someday i wont even have to work anymore...
later
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[20 Apr 2007|09:08am] |
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mood |
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angry |
] |
That is definitly not considered trying...
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[16 Apr 2007|09:23pm] |
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mood |
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 anxious |
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i was at the point of termination at work today.
i believe that someone was meaning to get me in trouble, well they were close!!
gladly what i had lost miraculously apeared in my box again... oh well, at least there is no termination for me.
i made two new song, and im pretty sure some poeple want to hear them...
we will see.
adios
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[15 Apr 2007|12:16am] |
| [ |
mood |
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blah |
] |
this situation is so questionable...
wow. so confusing.
im tired. like sleepwise
goodnight
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[24 Mar 2007|09:34pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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annoyed |
] |
why do i still feel so alone?
damn it!!
i want to be with my girlfriend so much right now.
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[23 Mar 2007|06:16pm] |
today... great
right now... im tired, really tired.
till next time.
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monkeyskatr8's journal